Thursday, February 6, 2014

I CONFESS---I AM SELFISH!

THE FIRST IN A TWO PART SERIES

I just love how God speaks to me and continually gives me a burning need to write down what He is revealing to me.  This topic all started when my sweet young friend announced she wanted to move to Africa to serve God.  My immediate reaction --"Your Momma is going to throw a fit!"  I understand--we Momma's do not want our chicks half a world away.  When Camille was in Erie--which was doable and affordable--but a ROYAL pain, it was SO difficult.  We could still talk daily---sometimes more than once--but there is a need to see their face.  As I laughingly used to say, "I need to put my eyeballs on her!"




When my sweet friend, Helen's son and family went to Africa to serve as medical missionaries--she was NOT a happy camper!  It is a LONG way to Africa!  They did a great work while there--but she missed the day to day involvement in their lives.  Missed watching her grands growing during that time.  Thankfully there are computers and facetime--but it is not the same.  It is quite different to observe their lives---in person.  I reminded her, "Who first took Mark to Africa and planted that seed?"  THAT was not what she wanted to hear.  We would laugh when she would tell me the purpose of their trips was NOT to put the desire in them to move there.  That was not HER purpose--but PLAINLY it WAS God's purpose.



A young friend from Ruston has SUCH a beautiful heart!  She is her mother's only daughter and they are so close.  She has moved to the other side of the world to live the life she has been called to.  She has lived her life with purpose to meet the requirements to make this move.  I know her mother must ache for her at times--and it will be at least a year before she can put her eyeball on her.  Surely she at times wonders "Why?" when considering it all?



Camille and I talked this over yesterday.  Would I be blessed to know that my children had made this choice and were living the faith--perhaps half way around the world?  It scares me to even think about it---I love having the closeness of my family-emotionally and physically.  I read between the lines as Camille gave her viewpoint--this has always been a possibility in their lives--I had forgotten.  Is God going to take me a step further in the trust journey and lead them on a servant's mission?  He has not opened that door for them at this time--but it brings me to a point of rethinking my relationship with Him.  I am selfish--I WANT THEM HERE!

I am always thinking there are mission fields HERE!  So many needs--so many lost--why not use us here?  I have a very real and in my face mission field here in "The Hood".  It did not take long to discover it.  Surely God wants to use us here!

Once again--I go to the bottom line---It is NOT about me---IT IS about the path He desires for us to walk.  ALL for HIS GOOD PURPOSE---even when we fight it every step of the way---cry out in selfish indignation---HE WILL BE GLORIFIED!  I am praying for a heart of submission---and eyes upon Him - asking Him to lead me down the path---walk by my side.  Give me a heart of obedience and a desire to help the lost and the willingness to put my selfish desires aside.


"Much is required from the person to whom much is given; much more is required from the person to whom much more is given."
Luke 12:48

1 comment:

  1. Love love love this! It is so hard to give up things that we hold so dear, but it seems to be a little bit easier when we know it is for the Lord's service. The Great Commission is well underway and I am grateful for the ones who get the call to see it through!

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Your comments keep my writing and often cause me to think. A written form of a hug or a pat on the back and an occasional slap into reality---I treasure them all!