I had a long time friend tell me this summer, "When you left, it put you in the wrong, to many of those looking on." One of the things I have learned is to not make excuses---no blame shifting--fess up to my part in a bad outcome and move forward. I must shoulder the blame for my reluctance to accept my responsibility for the events leading to my leaving, and the poor manners in refusing the generous offers of so many to say those good-byes.
Perhaps part of my reluctance to return to the place I will always call home--is the pain associated with my refusal to leave with grace. Yes, I was following God's lead by moving here, and I see the reasons every day why this was a good move. I have healed--and yes, there are scars--but my life is now going on and I anticipate with great joy what God has in store as I travel down His path. I do regret--- not leaving well---with the grace to say good-bye with my head held up and with the grace and dignity of one who had been loved well as I have loved so many.
One of my daily devotionals recently was on Paul's leave taking of the Ephesian Elders as described in Acts. What a beautiful testimony of how to leave when directed, but leave well. He left knowing he would not see them again, saying good-bye and giving instructions and admonishments of how to live as Believers, and finally a blessing. This is an example of leave taking as a Believer. Acknowledgement of all God has done and imploring His blessings on those you are leaving. A lesson---in grace and dignity.
"Now I commit you to God, and to the word of His grace,
which can build you up
and give you an inheritance among all those who are sanctified.