Friday, September 19, 2014

WHEN THE GOING IS TOUGH

Alone can be tough!  I have always enjoyed and needed some alone time--but too much aloneness  is not a good state of being.  I struggle --at times---with being alone.  This summer was particularly difficult for a variety of reasons.  I have vowed next summer will be different.

My married friends tell me---they often feel alone with someone in the room with them.  It is difficult to explain to them--even when there is not a word said---it is the awareness of another living -breathing human in the room/house with you.  Taken or not--there is opportunity to speak a word--share a thought-even perhaps entertain a laugh with another.  When the  doors are locked and the drapes are drawn and you become aware of only the sound of your breath, you are alone.

There are some who stuffed into small spaces with many bodies would love some alone time.  They look at me and envy what they see from the outside looking in.  I eat what I want when I want, I watch television or not, I sleep when I want and make all the choices for my days.  With the exception of babysitting chores and tutoring, I have no demands or insistent claims on my time.  Be careful what you envy and the grass is not always greener.  I miss those days of being so busy I did not know which end was up---of falling in the bed at night exhausted from a non-stop day from pre-dawn to late evening.  I enjoy my retirement, but I miss the perpetual buzz of activity and bodies of days gone by.

My soul cries out to God, "Help me---see that You are enough".  I commune with Him---my thoughts turn to Him---I seek His presence---but I am sad to say--it is not always enough.  He created us to be in relationships---so He understands this aloneness.  There is no answer---many of my friends and acquaintances voice the same feelings.  

Here is where faith comes to play---I have faith there is a reason I am alone--I have faith He is in control---I have faith He is by my side---I have faith He hears my cries---I have faith He will sustain me.  


 Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand.
Psalm 73:23

8 comments:

  1. Dear Lulu ... your heart words reflect what my single friends and clients speak often. Please know that your thoughts are heard. And that you are loved. Greatly.

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    1. Oh Linda, there really is no answer, but I thank you and others for listening.
      Bless you, Friend!

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  2. Lulu, this is a wonderful article from a really wonderful person. Your words evoke the true feelings of many people throughout the world. Loneliness can be difficult for many.

    Here in the UK we have many people living alone. Their children having grown up and left home for other towns and cities. I heard of a case about an elderly woman who, once a week, takes the bus to town and back again. She doesn't get off the bus. She does the round trip because it is her only opportunity to meet someone else.

    Your wonderful, wonderful words have one ringing truth: "I have faith He will sustain me." How right you are.

    Praying for you.

    God bless.

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    1. There you go, Victor---one more thing to be thankful for. I am not so isolated as to resort to riding buses to make contacts. Thank you for your kind words. His presence is always here!

      Bless You, Victor

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  3. I always enjoy your writings. Loneliness can be devastating for some. I do OK with a great deal solitude, but it may be because of the abuse I suffered as a child that I actually enjoy not being around others. Or, I'm just a grouch. :) I pray you're not feeling isolated. Believing and trusting in Christ really helps but may I also humbly suggest volunteer work, especially in a Nursing Home or Assisted Living Center? I did that for awhile and found it quite enjoyable. I like the elderly anyway. Sometimes just letting them talk or look at their old photos (which I really enjoy too) or go for a walk with them brightens their day. Or get a part-time job in the neighborhood. Also, having pets helps, especially dogs or cats. We all do whatever it takes to keep from feeling unwanted and going crazy. Have a blessed day. ~:)

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    1. Sparky, thank you for your comments and suggestions. I am a mentor/tutor in a local school and have volunteered as a tutor for a long time. I also just signed up for another local volunteer position with the homeless. I actually stay pretty busy during the school year---it is the summer and the nights when I am most lonesome. Working on that though! I do thank you for all your suggestions! Happy Weekend!

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  4. I fully understand what your saying (and agree with everyone else, btw). One can be lonely even when there are others around. Two different words (lonely and alone)-but so much a like. Thank you Lulu..keeping you in prayer. Blessings

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    1. Had not thought of the comparison/contrast of the two words, Linda. Well Done! I am thankful and blessed to have old friends and new in my life--like you.
      Saturday Blessings!

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Your comments keep my writing and often cause me to think. A written form of a hug or a pat on the back and an occasional slap into reality---I treasure them all!