I spent a week getting a crash course on all things three year old girls love. It has been a LONG time since her mom was three and I must admit this one is a chip off the old block.
One of the many things we did daily was watch a movie or cartoon (in hopes of Lulu getting a little rest). There seems to be a common theme in movies for little girls~there is always a mean girl. OH, you know the type--it is all about me--I will walk over you to get what I want--playing dirty is my middle name. Most of us have encountered a mean girl at some point in our life. Stabs in the back and back handed compliments are their specialty. Why you know what a back handed compliment is~ "Thank goodness you look better than the last time I saw you when you looked like an Ethiopian Refugee." I guess that is good--I no longer look like I am knocking on death's door.
Snarky nice to your face and your worst nightmare behind your back as they dissect you and feed you to the vultures circling around them. Mean girls are a force to be avoided at all cost. If you are not in their chosen friend pool, you are fair game. To be in the chosen friend pool, you have to agree and go along with whatever they say~however mean and low it may be. Their enemies are your enemies and bullying passively and aggressively is their specialty.
Here is what I have learned over a long life concerning mean girls and bullies. Feel sorry for them. WHY would anyone need to belittle, attack, and smear another? Because they do not feel good about themselves. With a poor self image, comes the need to drag all others in their wake down to their low self esteem. If I am not good-pretty-smart-popular, then I will make sure you are not either, is the name of the game. Rather than celebrating the successes and accomplishments of others, they attack and attempt to debase. Rather than being satisfied with all they have and have accomplished, they crave what others have too. There is never enough and their appetite for more is insatiable. They want everything on their plate and then everything on your plate and on and on. When they don't accomplish all they would like, then they hold anything others have accomplished in disdain. It is a sad existence. Feel sorry for those mean girls and you disarm their attack. Turn the other cheek and walk away for their attack is only successful if you care.
And then there is the lesson Beth Moore taught me while attending one of her conferences, "Pray for Them". WHAT--you gotta be kidding me!!! I was convicted and though I did not know what to pray---I lifted the mean girls in my life before God's throne. Admitting I did not know how to pray, I put their name before Him and the rest was up to Him. Though I had been a victim of the mean girl's attack, I forgave, and moved on, staying out of their wake.
As I have gotten older, I have learned to be nice, but avoid the mean girls in life. There are far too many sweet girls to surround one self with to allow a mean girl to hold any influence in your life. She takes what is yours~let her have it and good riddance. She speaks disparagingly of you, consider the source~most of us know whom we can trust with telling us the truth. As Mama would have said, "She is making her bed and she will have to sleep in it." WHOA to the mean girls out there---Mama has spoken! And above all pray for them, for they know no peace.
“There is no peace,” says the Lord, “for the wicked.”
Isaiah 48:22
I am conflicted by today's post, Lulu. I understand your Christian message of love and forgiveness, but the, some bullies are perhaps beyond forgiveness ... and love. Like a boss I had years ago who delighted in bullying everyone, including me. I was told at the time "to feel sorry for him" - great help that was since he continued bullying. So I made his behaviour known to higher management and told them I was resigning. I was soon transferred to a better job.
ReplyDeleteAs my uncle Rufus used to say: Always fight fire with fire. That's why he was fired from his job at the fire brigade. He always advised me with the saying: Sticks and stones may break my bones; but words will never hurt me. Then one day a printing press fell on him. I often wondered about his advice. He used to say: Take everything with a pinch of salt. Mind you, he made a terrible cup of tea. He died suddenly without saying "Goodbye". He collapsed at breakfast into a bowl of Cheerios!!!
God bless.
Uncle Rufus - now there’s a new character from The Life of Victor! Walk away is always on the list of options, Victor!!
DeleteBlessings, My Friend!
Uncle Rufus is here: http://timeforreflections.blogspot.com/2018/06/uncle-rufus.html
DeleteGod bless.
Mean girls...there sure are plenty of them around...sigh... I am giggling over Victor's comment, thank you. I totally agree; pray for them. They really must have a sad life, seriously. You know the situation we are going through and I recently been called a mean girl...mean for being the Power of Attorney and so on...mean, mean, mean...someone has to be a grown up and act like one. If I'm mean, then so be it...no, I'm not mean, frugal and high spirited, maybe. But never ever intentionally mean.
ReplyDeleteGet ready, for with your responsibilities, you are going to be attacked, second guessed and blamed. It’s not easy to sit in the driver’s seat, and criticizing is really easy. Praying for you as you sit on the hot seat, Friend!
DeleteBlessings!
I think the hardest commandment Jesus gave us is to love our enemies and pray for them. >Sigh< As Christians, we must obey Him and, with His help, we can forgive and forget.
ReplyDeleteBlessings, Lulu!
Oh, and your granddaughter is a peach! :)
She's a mess, Martha! YES, as I said, PRAY FOR THEM---YOU HAVE GOTTA BE KIDDING! It is a wonderful exercise in understanding what Jesus did for us!
DeleteBlessings, My Friend!