Identity Concealed To Protect the Guilty Party
Most of us are guilty---I say most, because there is a certain element among us, including #1 Daughter who are the Expiration Police. I NEVER paid any attention to these silly dates until I was thoroughly chastised by not only #1 Daughter, but Dr. Son In Law as well. Here is another great example of the everyday miracles experienced by not only me, but the legions of others who totally ignore those dates in super small print. OBVIOUSLY, they were not meant for my generation! With diminished eyesight, they are a mere blur on the back or bottom of the container. I eat away and SHOCK--I am still here and kicking having ingested tons of expired food! We all know as the sweet hubby above found out, it is not edible if it is truly expired. DUH! Those dates---why they are merely suggestions--NOT written in stone. A PLOY by the companies to get us to throw away perfectly good food and buy more. NOT ME--I live on the ragged edge of food poisoning and dare botulism to attack. I laugh in the face of these feeble attempts at warning! EAT & BE MERRY is my mantra!
Dr. Son In Law also has the nerve to examine the dates on the prescriptions in my medicine box. We all know these drugs just get stronger with time and will work even better. If it stopped diarrhea three years ago, the stopper has not been removed--only more effective. But here we go again, throwing away perfectly good partly used antibiotic, cough remedies, anti-histamines, and GASP pain medication. With my superior abilities to self diagnose after NO medical schooling and only Dr. Google to consult, I know EXACTLY what med and the correct dosage for every malady. Once again--another miracle--I am NOT dead---YET!
What IF we all had an Expiration Date tattooed on our forehead?
Our entire lives would center around getting it all done before E day! We would be in a huge tizzy trying to check off that bucket list all that we wanted to accomplish. And then--the date comes---and we go to bed that night convinced we would wake up in Eternity the next morning. As you slowly come out of the pre-dawn fuzz of deep sleep and try to prop your eyes open, you realize---
I AM STILL HERE!
OH--the date was not written in stone, but merely a suggestion--an estimate of how long you would be effective. SO the three score and ten--why it is just the national average--NOT the day you need to be thrown in the garbage heap.
God, in His infinite wisdom knows our expiration date, here on this terrestrial ball, but He does not share the date. Instead He gives us a guarantee of this moment and no more. I am quickly approaching three score and ten, but just like the expired box of Mac and Cheese I may be still good beyond the expiration date. So I make the most of each and every day, do not worry about when I might expire, live and love in the moment. Don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will take care of itself. AND for goodness sake, look through the pantry at least once a year to keep the Expiration Police at bay!