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Friday, March 20, 2020

2020 TP PANIC

For the life of me, I cannot understand WHY? in the world, so many are in a toilet paper panic.  As far as I know, the virus does not result in explosive diarrhea which might explain the panic buying.  I read on line today someone had even hi-jacked an 18 wheeler filled with TP.  If I decide to commit a crime which might result in long term imprisonment, it will NOT be for stealing toilet paper.  An armored car filled with more money than Carter had liver pills is more my style.



In an effort to practice social isolation, I am ordering my groceries on line and running by to pick them up.  Toilet paper was not available the first order.  I quickly counted all my TP resources and determined how long I could hold out before becoming desperate. It was similar to the daily glance at my dwindling savings thanks to the stock market free fall.  Thankfully by the second order (I am also cooking at home ALL the time now), the gold standard of TP-Charmin was once again available.  PLEASE SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO ME WHY THIS IS THE PANIC ITEM OF THE DAY???  



When we have hurricanes, water flies off the shelf.  At least that makes some sense!  There is a possibility with power outages and huge amounts of rain that the water system could become unsafe.  Unfortunately here in the deep South, some of the small rural water systems come under boil orders occasionally.  I don't know if they are not treating correctly or if a varmint got in the water supply, but before you drink, you must boil.  THEN it is understandable to have a water shortage.  Even though all that bottled water comes from the same taps we use in our homes, it has been tested.

When I stop to think of all the TP I have wasted in my lifetime--rolling yards of dear friends (the police frown upon this) and hitting that roll and letting it spin as if I am on The Price is Right and going for the grand prize while getting ready to check out of the BR.  The thought of my waste makes me cringe.  Who knew today's waste would become tomorrow's currency?

The TP though is a mystery!  Here is something you might need to be reminded of---TP HAS NOT ALWAYS BEEN AROUND!  W A Y B A C K--man had to figure out other ways to insure cleanliness.  If you are out hiking in the woods, and run out of biodegradable TP, there are leaves all around.  Just be careful to not pick the three leafed variety.


That could lead to a problem MUCH more serious than a dirty bottom. Which is more of a disaster a dirty bottom or an itchy bottom~I digress.

Here is what I want you to know---DO NOT PANIC if you cannot get TP.  Why  in my lifetime, when my oldest was a baby, there were NO wipes & his little tender bottom could not tolerate the rough TP.  SO, Friends, I used a warm wet wash cloth.  NOW before you yell GROSS---It was used one time and washed.  There you go--after the laundry I had a whole new batch of clean -reusable TP.  SO, Friends, don't panic---if you have wash rags and a washing machine---all is not lost.  If worse gets to worse we live deep in the piney woods--there are alternatives out there.  For goodness sake--STOP hoarding the TP!



Being cheerful keeps you healthy.
Proverbs 17:22

10 comments:

  1. In a word Fear it won’t be any when we need it. Fear causes people to do strange things. Like lining up for blocks to buys gun. It was Franklin Roosevelt who said that famous statement “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself “

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    Replies
    1. That’s it in a nutshell. That old demon fear is a crafty devil!!
      Blessings!

      Delete
  2. Amen, Lulu...glad to you blogging again, smiles.

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    1. I've missed all my blogging friends!
      Blessings, My Friend!

      Delete
  3. People need more toilet paper because in a panic you need the toilet more often. Like when cattle stampede. They leave a mountain of deposits behind.

    Our shop did not have any TP. I asked the manager for an alternative. He offered me sandpaper. Either that or a high-pressure water jet. Both were really fun in their own way. With the water jet you need the assistance of someone else, of course.

    The French of course have the bidet. Always had these. They are more advanced than most people. In Olden Days they had pots in the house before the modern toilet seat was invented. The servants used to empty the pots out of the windows into the street below. They shouted first "garde a l’eau!" which means watch out for the water!. And that's how showers were invented. In time the phrase travelled to England, (in a pot), and we too started showering each other. That's were the term "loo" for toilet comes from.

    You see, I'm full of interesting facts. I sit there on my throne thinking quite often. Reminds me of when I was young. We did not have a lock on our toilet door. I used to sit there and stretch my leg out with my foot behind the door. Pity the door opened outwards!

    God bless.

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    1. I love your stream of loose association, Victor. I have missed that while away from the blogging world! What a great sense of humor you have!
      Blessings!

      Delete
  4. Thank goodness we do have a supply at hand, but I don't understand the rationale behind (pun intended) the TP craze. A wet wash rag is a great alternative, Lulu, and I'll definitely keep that in mind if push comes to shove. Stay safe, my friend!
    Blessings!

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    Replies
    1. It is always good to have a back up plan!
      Blessings, My Friend!

      Delete
  5. you boomers are shutting down the entire economy because you're afraid of a flu. Seriously, can you boomers kill yourselves? You are the most selfish generation to ever exist. You don't give a shit about climate change, why should we young people give a shit if you get sick and die of some virus? I HOPE the virus gets much stronger and kills you all.

    Do you boomers realize how universally hated you are? There is not one single demographic that does not hate you- white people, black people, asians, mexicans, indians, chinese, millennials, GenX, GenZ. Something tells me that you boomers are not going to have a very comfortable or easy retirement, especially once you end up in the retirement homes.

    Can you baby boomers hurry up and fucking drop dead? Enjoy your retirement homes cause we younger people will not take care of you even if we wanted to, due to the shitty economy you boomers created. Do you boomers realize that the younger generation is simply waiting for you to fucking drop dead?

    You are all going to end up in retirement homes and we all know that the elderly gets treated pretty badly in retirement homes. Well, that's what you get for ruining your own children's lives. Even if your children WANTED to take care of you, they couldn't, due to you boomers destroying the economy. So I hope you enjoy the retirement homes, boomer scum!

    ReplyDelete

Your comments keep my writing and often cause me to think. A written form of a hug or a pat on the back and an occasional slap into reality---I treasure them all!