As I near the beginning of a new decade on this terrestrial ball, I found myself considering who I have become.  Over decades of life, I have slowly morphed into the one who stands before you today.  In any time of introspection, the question becomes are we pleased with our progress.  

Our Sunday School leader told us a story Sunday about setting goals as a couple annually.  Now not only did they set goals, but they reviewed how well they had done at the end of the year in reaching those goals.  He reported 50% was a GRAND year!  It is one thing to set a goal, but then to hold yourself accountable takes real courage.

I am nearing a decade of being alone.  In that decade, I have seen a  metamorphosis.  Going from a life which revolved around marriage and family to being a single mother of grown children has been a huge life change.  Spending plenty of time stumbling around in the dark and trying to find my way, I have slowly seen an emergence of the inner me.  It is natural and good for our lives and personalities to bend when we are in a relationship, but this also bends the essence of the real me.  When faced with only the reflection in the mirror, one must decide to either be purposeful in searching for and seeking to use our God given talents and strengths, or living in want of the past.  I chose to move forward and make the most of today.

Over these years, my friendships with women has deepened and given me great delight.  There is much to be said for a eclectic mixture of friends-different ages, likes, personalities, and persuasions.  These women have influenced the person I am today by giving me the courage to try new adventures, eat new foods, play new games, walk steps I have never trod before.  

The joy of serving another has transferred from my spouse to many different well deserving venues.  I have discovered a passion for children and the least of these.  Experiencing great rewards and, more important, joy from giving of myself has lead to a insatiable appetite for service.  There is no greater reward than the sweet smile of a child.

I have learned how to really play again.  Being silly, dancing for the fun of dancing, laughing until I hurt, and daring to connect with my inner child has been one of the biggest changes.  My entire adult life has been far too serious.  God gave us the gift of laughter for a reason and I have exercised that fun muscle religiously.

Blessed with friends who also claim a wanderlust need to see the glory of God's creation, I have traveled to many nooks and crannies.  When you travel in a group, it is much less expensive.  This has allowed me to see places I had only dreamed I would ever visit.  It has been one of the thrills of a lifetime each and every new sight and experience.  

Looking over this limited list of who I have become, I have decided I like me.  I would be my friend.  Now what more could I want but to realize I have morphed into a good friend, kind servant, fun loving, wanderer?  AND, thankfully, this package will continue to morph and change with each passing day.   The me you see before you today will not be the same me even a year from now.

One cannot help but look at how your relationship with God has morphed with time.  Am I still drinking the warm milk of an infant's needs, or have I bitten into the meat of a maturing and full relationship?  Am I seeking Him and searching for Who He is?  Am I so busy with the world, that I forget to seek His face until the storms of life wash over me?  Am I still crawling along the leaf nibbling, or am I wrapped in a cocoon of self absorption, or have I morphed into a beautiful butterfly delighting in His Goodness?  Am I morphing into sanctification or satisfied with status quo?  The deep questions of life keep me morphing.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.
 The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.
II Corinthians 5:17


  1. Dear me ... what a post, Lulu. I think your best line is: "I have decided I like me".

    When we look at ourselves, the best thing to do is to compare ourselves and our lot to others'. So let's compare:

    Have you ever slept in a train and gone way past your destination?

    Have you ever forgot your false teeth on a bus and had to go back and ask for them?

    Have you ever gone upstairs to the bathroom only to discover you live in a one-storey bungalow?

    Have you ever woken up from your sleep to find you missed the highway exit you wanted?

    Have you ever ran naked out of the shower because there was a wasp there?

    No? Have these things never happened to you? Then you're in good company because they did not happen to me either. But for a moment or two I had you guessing there, didn't I?

    So, enjoy your birthday, Lulu. Amongst family and friends and amongst those Blogging acquaintances you have made over the years. Wishing you a splendid time filled with joy, happiness and good health. (What's the difference between joy and happiness?) I knew a girl called Joy once. She was always melancholy. Face like a melon and body like a collie.

    God bless.

  2. Thank you, Victor, for the good wishes. However for a few more weeks, I am still a spritely 69. The big day is coming though when I fall through the hole into my 70’s, for at this point jumping gates is out of the question!
    Blessings, My Friend!

  3. Wow, Lulu, what a powerful, insightful reflection you've penned here. It is so important to take stock of who we are and where we are on life's journey, and to assess our relationship with God. Are we growing, or morphing, as you say, in the right direction? Are we still on milk, or have we graduated to solid food? I know you're not quite there, yet, my friend, but Happy Birthday and blessings!

    1. This B I G Number Birthday has the wheels turning, Martha! Time is dwindling and so much left to do!
      Blessings, My Friend!


Your comments keep my writing and often cause me to think. A written form of a hug or a pat on the back and an occasional slap into reality---I treasure them all!