It occurred to me I was living in the shadow of fear when discussing my investments. Satan takes our past--and the fears we have learned from our past and uses them against us. My daddy died when I was 14--my mother struggled to support our family of four and did not remarry until we were all grown. I was a young single mother for a few years--it was a huge struggle to go back to school and obtain that degree with no financial support. I literally lived on almost nothing. I remember wondering how I was going to buy needed shoes for my son. All this profoundly affected me for life.
Fast forward an entire lifetime. I am retired, I am alone and this is it--do not see any rich relatives out there or any big book deals headed my way. And the whispering starts in my ear. What else is God going to take away to teach me? Look what you have lost already---look what happened to Job---your future could be bleak. I am living under the cloud of fear instead of the promise of faith.
As I mulled all this over, Jonah popped to the surface. God had taken Jonah for quite the spin around the block and Jonah let God have it. He yelled at the Almighty - All Powerful God--"I knew this was going to happen!" Ranting and raving like a madman---Jonah let God know he did not like how things had turned out. It was NOT according to Jonah's plan. God patiently listened and then taught Jonah a valuable lesson. The Lord provides and the Lord takes away---and then reminds Jonah---you did NOTHING ---I provided it--so I can take it away.
It is a daily struggle to turn from my fears---and turn to my faith. All may be taken away---but nothing is gained from sitting under the bottle brush quaking in fear--except a victory for Satan. Who am I to question--and where is the trust I haughtily proclaim? If it all disappears today--and I am left on the street with not even one cent to my name---IS HE NOT THE SAME GOD WHO HAS FAITHFULLY WALKED BY MY SIDE THE ENTIRE PATH? Where is my faith--even if God sends a worm---He is the ALL WISE God--filled with love and grace.
"God arranged for a broad-leafed tree to spring up. It grew over Jonah to cool him off and get him out of his angry sulk. Jonah was pleased and enjoyed the shade. Life was looking up. But then God sent a worm."