AUTOMATIC RESPONSE

 How many of us answer the standard greeting question of "How are you?" with this~


"Fine"


Do you note the change in font?  This is a good indication of a lack luster--probably untrue reply.  Somehow the world has convinced us when the question is asked----no one really listens.  A sad commentary on the state of things, but in fairness perhaps based upon the asker that is all the response that is needed.   So we have learned to give this "non-answer" and move on.  Seldom does anyone push to dig deeper and there seems to be a sense of relief when we don't elaborate.


I was watching some mindless entertainment on television last night and this statement was made-


" I am not fine and that is okay"


Think about that!  I found this while searching for a photo to use for this post~





NOW---I will tell you--when you go beyond "Fine", you need to carefully choose who you are wiling to be truthful with.  So many times the question is asked to fill conversation and we know it is the polite thing to do.  BUT, if you ask the question, you need to be prepared for the answer.  If you do not really want to hear the complaints and problems and struggles of others, do not ask the question and expect the automatic one word response.  Some are walking around with a deep need to expound on their current state and you have just invited to participate in listening.  If you are unwilling, unable, short on time, or just do not care---don't ask the question.  There are other forms of polite greetings which you can use such as "It is good to see you" or even the age old--"What about this weather?".  You can convey interest and politeness without the need to open up a conversation you really do not care to be in.  Eye contact, a friendly smile, a handshake and a simple "Hello" are polite without need for further conversation.


I love a good one on one conversation, but there are times and places for that.  A room filled with people for whatever the reason is not the time or place.  Those deep conversations about how you are, should be reserved for when you have time, a private venue and if you really care.  Until then---if you ask the question, "How are you?", remember you asked and should be ready for the reply.  It may be that there is more there than the automatic response "Fine".


"Let each of you look not only to his own interests,

but also to the interests of others."

Philippians 2:4

4 comments

  1. This is wise information, Lulu, and we really should take it to heart.
    Danny is out of the hospital and we are in a motel. Leave for home tomorrow!
    Blessings!

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  2. Over here in the UK, when you meet someone for the first time you say, "How do you do?" and the expected reply is, "How do you do?"

    Strange? Well that's the polite way to respond.

    As for me, when someone asks me "How are you?" My response is, "What's it to do with you, you nosey person?" (I hope I made you smile, Lulu. I bet you did not expect that).

    Seriously though, I always say, "Thank God, all is well ... " or something like that. It's pointless telling them my problems and making them more miserable than they really are.

    Anyway, I don't know what drew me to your Blog today, but I did. Glad I did. God bless you, Lulu.

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    Replies
    1. My Old Friend Victor! What a treat to hear from you. You British are as bad as us Southerners with the "Being Polite". It is delightful! I will take that any day of the week over rudeness.

      YES, you made me smile---as always!
      Blessings!

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Your comments keep my writing and often cause me to think. A written form of a hug or a pat on the back and an occasional slap into reality---I treasure them all!