DEEP THINKING OR GENDER CHALLENGED

I have a friend that told me that I reveal way too much on my blog---I've thought about that a great deal---think that is the purpose of my blog---writing enables me to process--is a terrific aid in working through my thoughts.  I guess if you don't like what I am writing about---you should close this window and move on--I am NOT offended-in fact--I DO NOT EVEN KNOW!!!

SO I've been talking to some friends about a recent revelation I've had---almost ALL the pain in my life has come because of a relationship with a man.  When one of them asked if I had any women that had disappointed me---I could not at the moment think of a one--especially among my friends.  They validate me---listen to me---encourage me---in general love me well.  I have never felt rejection---or that I came up "short" in any of my female friend relationships.  I can't think of a single female that has "walked out" on our relationship-----know that they cherish our friendship---and are genuinely concerned about me.

Contrast that with my relationships with men---outside of my sweet brothers and sons---almost without fail---all of the really important male relationships I have had --lead to disappointment--rejection---feeling inadequate and even abandonment.  This is MUCH deeper than I will reveal here (I do hold back on some things)--suffice it to say---I have been permanently scarred and forever changed---left in the wake of pain and inadequacy.

SO---I have been thinking---are my choices wrong---is there something wrong with me--what has been going on here?  Perhaps--it is best --I just stick with female relationships. Interested in what you have to say or contribute---on-line or in my ear---love to hear your thoughts!

 i