SERVING TO THE END

When you read this post, you will know I am officially old!.  I can pinpoint where the thought had its origin, but as always, it was a circular path to get to the point of today's post.  I want to record certain memories for my children and grands to know  some of my life stories.  This is one of those memories of something which is no longer observed.

It was the custom, by some, but not all, for someone to stay with the dearly departed until their earthly body was committed to the grave.  Family members and close kin considered this a sign of respect and love to spend their appointed time sitting by the casket.  When I researched this, before we had funeral homes, who now house the deceased until their comital, the wake was conducted in homes and the body of the deceased would be at home during the time before the funeral.    Now from what I read, originally there were a number of reasons someone stayed with the body, until the burial.  I will refrain from going there, but needless to say, by the time I came along this was no longer the case.  I remember distinctly my father performing this vigil, though never my mother.  As a young adult, I took a turn sitting at the funeral home with a dear older friend's husband who was also one of my clients.  This is the only time I did this, as by this time---it was literally a dying tradition.  With the advent of funeral homes housing the bodies, this tradition slowly went away.  The night I took a shift I stayed from after the calling hours until the wee hours of the night when I was relieved by the next sitter, it was an experience I have never forgotten.  You could call it an other world experience.  I was sitting by the body--alone in a funeral home---lights dimmed---deathly (pun intended) quiet.  Thankfully I am not easily spooked, but if anyone had popped out from behind a curtain, they probably would have had to bury me too.  I was doing this for my friend, the dearly departed had no idea, but she wanted someone with him.  I could take that one point of stress off her in this time of intense grief.  I did it for the love of my friend.   Traditions such as this--though sweet ---are long lost---probably because of the realization it is not only no longer necessary, but costly for funeral homes. If the funeral home had someone there to sit vigil, some staff member would have to be present every hour someone was in the funeral home for safety and liability reasons.  The closest thing to this is when an important royal or statesman dies as with Queen Elizabeth or George H.W. Bush.  Someone stood vigilance or "guard" over those coffins until they were interred.

How many times in life do we do things out of love---not really understanding the why's and in some cases thinking this is not necessary, but we do it anyway.  A true act of love is done with no thought of repayment ---only serving someone we love.  THAT, my friends makes for a good life--when you go above and beyond without thought of yourself.  NOW---I am not tooting my own horn for I have also spent much more time being self serving than not, but I also realize the times I served were also the best of times.  

"Be devoted to one another in love.

Honor one another above yourselves."

Romans 12:10