WHEN I AM WEAK

 Have you ever looked around you and allowed yourself to observe?  With time and thought, you may discover others have exactly what you think you want.  Their lives look so full and you cannot understand why you are not living a life such as theirs.  Their families seem as if they came for a Hallmark movie.  Their marriages are long and successful with someone who still wants to hold their hand after decades.  Their homes are warm and invitingly decorated with style.  Their dinners are gourmet creations with seemingly no effort.  You notice others in your line of work who have worked their way to the top of the field.  They are well rounded and well respected and possess great integrity.  Everyone in their wake walks away impressed and desiring to be just like them.  Everything they attempt is mastered and they never seem to fail.  Every trip is perfect and they have traveled extensively and enjoyed great adventures.  Every single aspect of their lives seems perfect in every way.

The world would have you believe their are those who lead this perfect life.  Perhaps they may even think they have achieved perfection.  What I have learned is to not envy---not even desire that perfection.  With every hole I have climbed out of, every mountain which had to be scaled, every roadblock creating need for detour, every health scare requiring patience, every loss of the dearest.  In fact with every sad, difficult, heart wrenching disappointment I have learned things are not always what they seem when you are looking at others.  My most significant growth has always come with adversity.  At no time is God more apparent than when I am struggling, suffering, and in despair.  When I run out of places to turn, and recognize I cannot do this without Him ~ I finally get it.  I cannot do this without a relationship with God.  All the other--though nice--is temporary---He is eternal.  No matter what I do, what success I claim, how loving my family is, how good my health---it is all fleeting.  He is everlasting.  

Real growth and spiritual maturity comes with real struggle and pain.  When our humanness fails us then I realize only by His Grace can I hold my head up.  These lyrics say it so well~

You are my strength when I am weak

You are the treasure that I seek

You are my all in all 

Taking my cross my sin my shame

Raising again I praise Your name

You are my all in all

When I fall down You pick me up

When I run dry You fill my cup

You are my all in all

Jesus, Lamb of God

Holy is Your name

Jesus, Lamb of God

Holy is Your name

"Not that I speak in regard to need,

for I have learned in whatever state I am,

to be content:

I know how to be abased,

and I know how to abound.

Everywhere and in all things

I have learned both to be full

and to be hungry,

both to abound and to suffer need.

 I can do all things through Christ

Who strengthens me."

Philippians 4:11-13