DON'T HOLD BACK

Have you ever heard a story that at first glance struck your funny bone, but after more thought you were deeply saddened?  I was told such a story this past week, which I will share with you.  I do not even know the names of the parties involved, so there is no one to protect.



A husband was commenting on how he loved to cuddle with his wife.  All is fine--and even after three children, he still finds her beautiful and desirable.  One thing that can throw a bucket of cold water on any more cuddling is the husband touching the wrong spot on the wife.  You see after three children your stomach does not look the same as pre-children.  If the husband happens to pull the wife closer by gently tugging while touching her stomach, the game is over.  Do not pass go, go directly to jail, because you have broken the cardinal rule of no touching the stomach.

I laughed out loud when I heard this story.  For you see, I totally identify with it.  My three children were whoppers at birth.  I am not a large woman---my stomach has NEVER been the same.  I have done thousands of sit ups, leg lifts, planks, and ever other abdominal torture you can imagine to regain the firm belly of my youth.  It simply is NOT going to happen.  As it was described when the story was told, you have a pouch--really it is loose skin from all the stretching during pregnancy and it will NEVER be the same again.  (NOW you know my deep dark secret)



We don't like to be reminded of our imperfections and touching is a strong reminder.  Convinced the entire rest of the world has flat stomachs--for after all that is all you ever see in the media--we are very conscious of our short coming.  No matter what anyone may tell you about how you look, you only believe the mirror.  A quick glance at your profile will have you headed for the moo moo aisle at the local clothing outlet.

Here is what is really sad about this after much thought.  We forget to be thankful for three healthy babies and instead focus on what in the world happened to my body.  We forget to be thankful for a spouse who only sees us as beautiful and still desires our mature body and instead believe the media's idea of beauty.  We forget the beauty of love and the deep connection of a husband and wife and instead push away from that beauty because of our shame over what we perceive as our short coming-a round belly.  We hold a part of ourselves back.

So it is with God, we push Him away when we feel our imperfections are showing.  He couldn't possibly love us with our __________--you fill in the blank.  Whether it is a hidden sin, need for more, sharp tongue, jealousy--whatever, how could He love us if we allow Him to view the real us?  So, we hold back--try to keep Him from really seeing us.  AND all the time, He loves us--no matter what--battle scars, flaws, sin, short comings---HE LOVES THE ENTIRE PACKAGE.  There is nothing He wants more than for us to confess what we see as our weakness so He can assure us--He still loves us.  Don't hold back--give Him your all and experience the wonder of how deeply He loves. We are perfect in His sight.


You, Lord, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call to you.
Psalm 86:7

4 comments

  1. I think this husband who pulled his wife by the stomach should know better. Does he not know what ears are for?

    As for women having large stomachs after child-birth; don't they realise this applies to men too after a few too many beers and pizzas or steaks and potato chips? Some men have such large stomachs that when they go to the toilet they cannot find what they are looking for to aim straight. Women are luckier in this respect.

    God bless.

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    1. As I wrote this, I wondered what you would comment, Victor. You never disappoint!
      Blessings!

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  2. Lulu, you are so right - we are always beautiful to God, no matter what we look like on the outside. I love how you've described those "flaws" that come with babies and aging as blessings in disguise. Because in truth? They are!
    Blessings, my friend!

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    1. Yes, reminders of all He has given us and how He has been by our side!
      Blessings, Martha!

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Your comments keep my writing and often cause me to think. A written form of a hug or a pat on the back and an occasional slap into reality---I treasure them all!