ONE WAY OR TWO WAY ROAD

Have you ever met someone going the wrong way on a one way street?

MANY times you will see a news report of someone causing an accident when they were going the wrong way on the highway.  I remember a report of one such incident--they gave him the nickname ~"Wrong Way Joe". (Thankfully no one was hurt).   You really cannot have great empathy until you have made the mistake of turning onto a One Way, totally unsuspectingly, the wrong way.  BEEN THERE--DONE THAT!  You are quickly looking for a place to turn around as your inner panic button begins to scream at you.  This is NOT a blog about driving.  You need to go to the loose association side of your brain, because that is where this came from.

While having a conversation recently with my daughter we began discussing someone I have a relationship with.  She called this person my friend.  I quickly replied they are not my friend.  As I vocally worked through this with her, I told her friends have a two way relationship.  What I had with this person was one sided.  Lots of giving on one side, but no giving on the other.  I was in a servant relationship with them.  There is NOTHING wrong with being a servant.  In fact, we are all called to be servants.  The problem was calling this relationship a friendship when there was no indication of the give and take normally associated with being friends.

I looked up the definition of friendship and among others found these descriptions~

A state of mutual trust and support

A state of mutual affection, esteem, intimacy and trust between two people

As I read further, I found this ~"A real friend is someone that you can rely on"

SO where in the world am I going?  We all have what I would classify as true friends in our lives. Friends can share the nitty gritty with each other and accept and love the other in spite of the nitty gritty.  Friendship is always a two way street.  I have a few really deep friendships and consider myself greatly blessed.  I have other friends, which I have great affection for, but because of time and opportunity the level of deep intimacy is not possible.  I am thankful for all of the friends God has placed in my life and recognize it is always a two way street.

The real point and question of this blog is what level of intimacy are you experiencing with God?  Is it a two way street?  Are you listening?  Do you experience two way communication with God Almighty?  It can be the deep intimate relationship we all desire, but only if there is two way communication.  Are we only giving Him a laundry list of our prayer request?  Are we listening for Him?  Or are we reading His Word, Saying our prayers, attending worship and even doing good because we need to check that off our daily list.  Is our relationship with God Almighty a deep and intimate two sided relationship?

"Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you."

James 4:8

CROSSING BOUNDARIES

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Yesterday's post on climbing fences, led to my friend and shady path owner, Jackie offering me a key to the gate.  I laughed and told her the story would not be nearly as funny if I had a key.  Thank you, Jimmie & Jackie for allowing me access to your shady path and the key offer.  I enjoy getting a laugh from you, dear readers, and I do not for once second mind the laugh coming at my expense.  I do ask that you refrain from trying to catch me climbing that fence with Hero in hand for a photo.  That is taking it a little too far.

NOW for the topic of the day~

We have a couple of counselors who alternate meeting with the ladies at 

once a week.  They are focusing our sessions on dealing with relationships.  In case you did not realize it, relationships can be

SO STICKY, you might believe you have stepped into quick sand or stuck your foot in a cauldron of hot tar.  No matter how you try, you cannot seem to pull yourself away from the mess you have waded off into. Last week we talked about boundaries and how to handle those who insist upon crossing them.  A great example, but simple one was given by one of the ladies concerning someone standing WAY TOO CLOSE in a line in a public forum (grocery store).  This is NOT a good idea during a pandemic.  Getting the space intruder to back up without seeming to attack them is sticky business.  It requires finesse and tact to disarm a potentially explosive situation.

I began to think about the giraffes in the book I just finished West With Giraffes.  Those giraffes have such sweet faces with doe eyes which seem to welcome you into their space.  BIG MISTAKE! if you get too close to those lethal weapons of LONG & STRONG LEGS!  The giraffes will lash out and literally kick you into tomorrow if you cross the boundary and get too close.  You DO NOT want a giraffe kicking you!

The giraffe has generations of being taught to be on the lookout for lions.  A giraffe will make a good meal for a pride of lions.  Giraffes instinctively are fearful and suspicious of lions.  They are constantly on the lookout for a sneak attack  as the  lions nip at their legs trying to take them down.  A giraffe does not know if you are a friend or lion when you approach them.  For the sake of their safety, they immediately lash out with those dangerous kicks  once you get too close and cross the boundary of their safe zone until they are convinced you mean no harm.  By then it could be too late, the damage is done.  It took establishing trust with the giraffes for them to no longer feel threatened by the keepers in the book.

If you watch nature long enough,

it will turn ugly.

WHERE could I possibly be going with this?  Unless you are going on an African safari or plan to take a job as a giraffe keeper at the zoo, what in the world can you do with this information?

There are giraffes all around us in the shape of our fellow humans.  Based upon past experiences, the person in front of you may think you are a lion who is going to attack and try to take them down.  Their defenses go up automatically and they lash out without even knowing if you are friend or a lion.  No one wants to be hurt or harmed, so we learn to be defensive in our responses to others.  Defensiveness often takes on the face of offensiveness--the attacker.   It is a sad commentary on the world, BUT it also is a learning tool for our response to those prickly pears in life.  I always wonder where the attack is coming from when I feel those legs lashing out at me.  Why? is always in the back of my mind.  There is almost always more to a situation than what meets the eye.  SO the lesson to be learned is how to establish and enforce boundaries without it feeling threatening to others.  Important life lessons are being taught at The Well.  Never too late to learn something new!

" My dear brothers and sisters,

take note of this:

Everyone should be quick to listen,

slow to speak,

and slow to become angry,

because human anger does not produce

the righteousness that God desires."

James 1:19-20