One of my major adjustments, as a single, has been no one to bounce decisions, thoughts, ideas, plans off of.  I am on my own.  For my entire life, I had a parent or a partner to talk over those really big decisions in life.  I relied upon those listening ears and good advice.  Big things---like starting my own CPA practice, buying homes, buying cars, and on down the list to the small day to day things necessary to live---insurance decisions to the mundane--what cable package to buy---there was always someone to listen--no more.

I spent my entire professional career advising men to NOT "Take Care Of" their wives---but to include them in all the details of the business of running a home and allocating resources.  When meeting with the women, I commended them on their knowledge of their family's business and encouraged them to understand all aspects of the economics of life.  It was heart breaking to see a woman left alone who had been lovingly sheltered from all of this.  How many times did I have a grieving widow sit before me, who was doing good to put one foot in front of the other---and now the shell shock of being thrown into the management of all that it takes to keep a family running correctly.  These men, though their intentions were good, did their wives no favor.  How much easier would it have been for them to have a working knowledge and understanding of the family finances.

My struggle has centered around--HUGE--decisions concerning my future--that there has been no one to discuss them with.  Many times---I just need to speak the words out loud to another---to affirm I am headed to the correct decision.  There no longer is anyone to listen and thus I am left with a little doubt when turning corners.  There are some things that I can discuss with my children--and they have offered good advice, but there are business/investment related decisions that are not in their zone of expertise.

I also have always enjoyed great theological discussions.  Nothing can get me going like a heated debate on the five points of Calvinism (another day we will talk that over).  I deeply miss having another to challenge me to thinking while we are speaking of our God.  Before I moved, I had a sweet group I lunched with every Sunday after church.  They helped fill that gap for a time--all I had to say was "What did you think about today's message?" and we were off to the races.  Iron sharpens iron---miss having that whetting stone.

BOTTOM LINE---I am making these decisions---with apprehension at times--but using a lifetime of knowledge and wisdom based upon experience---I am moving forward.  I ask myself---if this goes wrong--what  is the worst thing that can happen?  If the worst case scenario is within the tolerable limits of loss---I proceed.  PRAYER---LOTS OF PRAYER---go into each decision---No decisions are made in haste---ALL are thoughtfully mulled over before any commitment is made.  THEN I make the leap of faith.  I am doing the best I can with careful consideration and ultimate trust that ALL things work for good!  It has not been easy--but I am just doing it!

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see ."

Hebrews 11:1

1 comment

  1. Stepping out on blind faith is the hardest thing I ever had to learn. It does take a lot of prayer to be sure that the voice I am hearing telling me to go in a certain direction is not my own, but that of the Lord.


Your comments keep my writing and often cause me to think. A written form of a hug or a pat on the back and an occasional slap into reality---I treasure them all!