YES-HERE I AM!

Second in the two part series-

As I was thinking over the things God sometimes requires of us, I went a step beyond God using our children in His service.  I began thinking of the things that God may be asking me/you to do--give up--sacrifice.  Perhaps it is something as simple as giving of our time in service---perhaps He is drawing you to a mission field--locally or internationally--perhaps it is as simple as loving those that are not so lovable.  I believe with all my heart- as we grow In Him---He is going to require us to get out of our comfort zones.  I do not know about you--but I do NOT like to leave my zone of comfort!

Did God allow my marriage to end to use me in Fort Worth?  I do not have the answers--but while thinking it over, I came to the conclusion His desire was not for my marriage to end--that is contrary to His Word.  He DID take the brokenness resulting from this life event and use it to Woo me and pull me closer into His embrace.  He took what man had made a mess of and used it to further His cause.  He has made me a living example of His faithfulness and love.  He has given me many opportunities to point to my source of strength during the pain and devastation of the unthinkable.  He has given me the privilege of leaving my comfort zone and living in a God zone.

Moving to Fort Worth seemed to be filled with risks and WAY out of my comfort zone.  There have been days when I experienced new levels of alone--and yet He has reminded me of His presence--His love--His plan.  As I walked down this path where He had led me---I have become supremely aware of Who He Is?  Slowly He is pulling others back into my life--but His intent and purpose though not always clear---are all for His good purpose--even in the midst of risk and uncertainty.

There is a story in His Word of a father who was required to take his son to be sacrificed on the altar. His beloved son--his most precious relationship- A love offering to The Father.  Unthinkable that He would ask this--and yet--in a step of faith and obedience Abraham was prepared to do just that---offer Issac as a sacrifice--give him back to God.  Genesis 22 contains this story of Abraham and God's redemption of His request.  When God called out to Abraham, Abraham's answer was "Yes, here I am."  

When God calls to us--telling us of the changes in our lives, are we willing to answer, "Yes, here I am."?  God allows heartbreaking losses in our life which are devastating.  His intent is not to break us--but to grow us when these life events happen.  Our response --either we cling to Him--allow Him to use us and grow us--and be used for His good purpose---OR we drown in the sorrow and heartbreak and cling to the familiarity of the pain---unwilling to be healed.  Yes--losses are painful--they will leave a scar--but we have the opportunity to turn to the source of the healing balm--and then allow Him to use us--scars and all.

"Some time later God tested Abraham; he called to him, “Abraham!” And Abraham answered, “Yes, here I am!”

2 “Take your son,” God said, “your only son, Isaac, whom you love so much, and go to the land of Moriah. There on a mountain that I will show you, offer him as a sacrifice to me.”"

Genesis 22:1-2

I CONFESS---I AM SELFISH!

THE FIRST IN A TWO PART SERIES

I just love how God speaks to me and continually gives me a burning need to write down what He is revealing to me.  This topic all started when my sweet young friend announced she wanted to move to Africa to serve God.  My immediate reaction --"Your Momma is going to throw a fit!"  I understand--we Momma's do not want our chicks half a world away.  When Camille was in Erie--which was doable and affordable--but a ROYAL pain, it was SO difficult.  We could still talk daily---sometimes more than once--but there is a need to see their face.  As I laughingly used to say, "I need to put my eyeballs on her!"

When my sweet friend, Helen's son and family went to Africa to serve as medical missionaries--she was NOT a happy camper!  It is a LONG way to Africa!  They did a great work while there--but she missed the day to day involvement in their lives.  Missed watching her grands growing during that time.  Thankfully there are computers and facetime--but it is not the same.  It is quite different to observe their lives---in person.  I reminded her, "Who first took Mark to Africa and planted that seed?"  THAT was not what she wanted to hear.  We would laugh when she would tell me the purpose of their trips was NOT to put the desire in them to move there.  That was not HER purpose--but PLAINLY it WAS God's purpose.

A young friend from Ruston has SUCH a beautiful heart!  She is her mother's only daughter and they are so close.  She has moved to the other side of the world to live the life she has been called to.  She has lived her life with purpose to meet the requirements to make this move.  I know her mother must ache for her at times--and it will be at least a year before she can put her eyeball on her.  Surely she at times wonders "Why?" when considering it all?

Camille and I talked this over yesterday.  Would I be blessed to know that my children had made this choice and were living the faith--perhaps half way around the world?  It scares me to even think about it---I love having the closeness of my family-emotionally and physically.  I read between the lines as Camille gave her viewpoint--this has always been a possibility in their lives--I had forgotten.  Is God going to take me a step further in the trust journey and lead them on a servant's mission?  He has not opened that door for them at this time--but it brings me to a point of rethinking my relationship with Him.  I am selfish--I WANT THEM HERE!

I am always thinking there are mission fields HERE!  So many needs--so many lost--why not use us here?  I have a very real and in my face mission field here in "The Hood".  It did not take long to discover it.  Surely God wants to use us here!

Once again--I go to the bottom line---It is NOT about me---IT IS about the path He desires for us to walk.  ALL for HIS GOOD PURPOSE---even when we fight it every step of the way---cry out in selfish indignation---HE WILL BE GLORIFIED!  I am praying for a heart of submission---and eyes upon Him - asking Him to lead me down the path---walk by my side.  Give me a heart of obedience and a desire to help the lost and the willingness to put my selfish desires aside.

"Much is required from the person to whom much is given; much more is required from the person to whom much more is given."
Luke 12:48

HOW DID YOU GET THROUGH IT?

I recently went to dinner with three new sweet friends.  All ages--all life stages--and different social status.  Three hours later--I came away with new insight and cause to think as I reflected on the night's conversation.  God has put new people in my life--and I am slowly gaining new relationships.  As the old song says--"Make new friends, but keep the old.  One is silver and the other gold."

During the evening, the question was asked of a friend who tragically lost her husband 22 years ago---"How did you make it?"  She is a very tiny-soft spoken beautiful lady--who in her own profound way simply stated, "At the end of each day, I asked God to show me what I had to be thankful for that day."  A practiced-intentional act of remembering at the day's end--to look back and concentrate on what was good about the day.

  My new friend has given me a beautiful example to follow as I learn her story.  She also has a disabled son who lives with her and always will-as long as she is here with us.  She is a beautiful example of servant hood and dependence upon the Father.  I am thankful that God is using her to teach me.

So often we all get mired down in the difficult--the painful--that which causes great suffering and sorrow.  We are all "Fallen" and tend to be whiners and complainers about the path our lives have taken.  We only look on one side of the path toward the brambles and briers.  A simple turn of our head and we would see the beauty on the other side and all we have to be thankful for.  Our lives are abundantly filled with so many blessings--why then do I stare at the briers & brambles?

I pray for intention of keeping my eyes upon the beauty of the path.  I will stop each day, at the day's end,  as I put my head upon the pillow and remember the day for what it was---and give a last prayer of thanks as He reminds me of the beauty of the day.

"Giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ"

Ephesians 5:20

LIVING THE CHARGE

WAY back --we adopted two college students through our local church. We were blessed to have two young women come into our lives who had a lasting impact upon me.  One was a sweet-naive---OLD SOUL--from Shreveport.  When I think back--she was SO young---but SO serious and driven.  A double major in a language I did not speak--- Graphic Design--and journalism, Meredith was brilliant and super talented--but more important she loved the Lord intensely-deeply--AND she lived her faith---still does in a BIG WAY today.

While attending Tech, she jumped in with BOTH feet---it was not enough to have a double major--but she also edited the school paper--and in her spare time worked for ELS.  ELS is an organization which prepares foreign students to pass the required English competency test before entering the university.  Meredith used this as an avenue to establish relationships with students from all over the world.  As she developed these friendships, she then shared her faith when given the opportunity.  She "Earned the Right" by first being their friend.  During her years at LA Tech, she interned two summers in New York City for a large publishing house and traveled to China for Chinese immersion her last summer.

After graduation Meredith moved to Princeton, New Jersey to work for ELS at THE Princeton.  An only child---VERY close to her mother--Meredith made the move half way across the county to the foreign Yankee land and lived and worked.  She once again set out to do the very same thing there---make friends--establish friendships--share her faith.

God then orchestrated a "Wonderful Work"---through my dear friend's niece--who lives in St. Louis---who had a friend that lived in Princeton--my friend tells her niece who tells her friend--who contacts Meredith-in an effort to help her make friends.  WAIT-it gets better---eventually this leads to Meredith being asked to come to Houston for an interview by the Princeton's friend's company.  Meredith accepts the job--moves to Houston--to work for a Non-profit that is putting in water wells in drought stricken--water poor --third world countries. Still working as a servant, Meredith jumps into this job and also begins working with the cause of "Human Trafficking".  

Today---Meredith just returned from Africa--where they are working with the indigenous people---establishing new territories for new wells and observing how those that have been dug are working.  She posted this video on Facebook along with the sweet story.  This well is by the house of the "Sunday School Teacher" who is also the "Well Keeper".  She tends and supervises the well.  The one rule she enforces for those standing in line and waiting their turn to get water is "No Gossiping in Line."  Here is a quote from Meredith-

"This is Pastor Joshua Makuwerere's church, an Apostolic Church of Zimbabwe, in a community called Overspill, south of the capital city. The Sunday school teacher, Fadzai, is the sweet well caretaker who lives between the church building and the well. "

"The words of this song go something like, 'Who could have been so good to give us this well? It must be from God.' "

Meredith is an living example of living the charge---so proud of her and blessed that God placed her in my life...She Inspires Me!

"³ Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed. ⁴Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked."

Psalms 82:3-4

HAVE YOU EARNED THE RIGHT?

This is SUCH a VITAL--NO CRUCIAL topic that I have one more post--before putting the pen down on this one.  I am preaching to myself---and if it resonates with you---perhaps you too.  There has been an entire sermon series at church on this hallmark of our faith and a subsequent discussion in small group each week.  When much is said about any subject--it belies us to sit up, pay attention, and come away with a "take away" or course of action.

One of my new friends in small group is fascinating and I must admit almost takes me back at times.  Not easy to make me stop in my tracks--and blow me away--but she is very outspoken and tells you just what is on her mind.  I LOVE HER!  You will learn where my mind is by listening to me jabber, but I am also very careful of hurting your feelings and tend to lean toward political correctness---not always a good thing.  This puts it out on the line--and leaves you with no doubt as to her thoughts.  She also is open to listening to others and is compassionate and has a soft heart.  She does not always let others see that softness---working in a high pressure -- large Fort Worth public establishment has led to blunt truth telling.

In one of our conversations about the sharing of the gospel in small group, she made this statement--

"You have to earn the right to share the faith with someone."

This is one of two guiding principles in the "Young Life" movement-which she has years of background with.  The other principle-

"It is a sin to bore a teen with the Gospel of Jesus Christ."

STOP-  think those over--I have spend PLENTY of time thinking about them.

How do you earn the right to share and why is it so important that you have? The Gospel is lived out and displayed for the world in the lives of believers.  Especially here in the US, we have no reason to not live according to His Revealed Word.  Non-believers are watching us--and judging The Gospel by our reflection.  DAUNTING THOUGHT!  NOW the good news is---God can take the ship wreck our lives can become and use even that.  It did give me pause to think when I am sharing The Good News---what has my reflection been to the one with whom I am sharing?   Have I shown the love of Christ to the one I am sharing with?   Have I effectively been the eyes, hands and feet of Christ here on this earth?  

After she made this statement, I did later come to the conclusion if you are given the nudge to share---SHARE!  We never know and God works in mysterious ways---we may be the seed sower and someone with the right may water the ground later.  If God opens the door--invite them in.

I do believe our most effective mission field is with those we have trust and influence with.  Those that see us living our lives with Him in the center and the peace that passes all understanding radiating from our lives.  Knowing us best and wanting what we have---Jesus---is evangelism 101---having the right by living the faith and then sharing The Word.

"And he said to them, “Go into all the world and proclaim the gospel to the whole creation."

Mark 16:15

CRYING OUT TO HIM

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He desires for you to turn to Him---EVERY TIME---ALL THE TIME!

LIVING IN THE HOOD

I am settled and all is done--including organizing the garage--except hanging some curtains.  Did I tell you I bought a new drill---SUCH fun with the new drill!  I LOVE a power tool!

No pictures--but they are coming.  Camera battery seems to have died during the move and I need to locate the charger--IT IS HERE SOMEWHERE!

It is so quiet compared to living by the university.  There is a train track very close--but that has become a lullaby compared to the loud partying associated with college life.  I do miss the church bells!

I met one of my neighbors--and we have had quite the conversation.  I must say--I enjoy her a great deal--but she is different.  I have lived in a bubble for all of my life.  I have named her, Mother Earth, and I am sure she would not be offended.  She has multiple bumper stickers indicating her love of Mother Earth and being one with her.  She is disabled and not able to work---BUT she has 8 (EIGHT) dogs and cats living with her---BIG DOGS--as one is a Great Dane.  

We have already had a discussion about our faiths---and when she told me she is a Unitarian---and believes Jesus was a good man--I told her I would like to tell her what Jesus is to me on my front porch one night when not hurried or stressed.  She has extensive knowledge of gods and goddesses and Buddha--that she has already told me about.  Within five minutes of meeting her she told me she was a hippy.  I laughed and told her she was born in the wrong generation, but there are certainly many hippies still around.

I found it very interesting that she would tell me this so early in our conversation--but also know it is very telling.  I am looking forward to my many times of conversation with her to come.  Could this be one of the reasons that God has placed me here?

Meanwhile--my first over-night guest is coming tomorrow night!  Meredith--my adopted college student--is coming through on her way to her home in Shreveport.  She arrived home from Zimbabwe this week and I am SO looking forward to hearing her stories of this mission for God.

SO while she is here---the meeting of the SSS will convene at my little cottage.  I am cooking and we are fellowshipping AND hearing about Meredith's adventure.

The Cottage feels more like home--here in the hood--already.  My little cottage looks like me---and I am putting my touches all over it.  I will forever miss Ruston--but I am blessed with where He has me.